I’m Going To Become A Flake

I was so inspired when Abraham on Saturday confessed to Esther being a flake.

It happened when a woman came up to ask a question and said: “Abraham, how do I become a close friend of Esther?” …. huh? “Yeah, I want to be able to call her on the phone and chat”… I may have the exact words off but this was the upshot…. the whole audience was sitting there like “uh… what?!!!!”

Abraham was awesome. Abraham said something that has etched permanently into my consciousness. THE ONLY WAY ESTHER HICKS CAN DO WHAT SHE DOES IS BY BEING A FLAKE. Wow!!!!

Every time she checks her email, the list is too long to even comprehend. Her cell phone is so drowning in communication attempts, that she could spend the whole day answering. So now, even her sister can’t reach her on her cell phone.

I totally love this.

This to me is the modern day version of the intention of my favorite movie: “Into The Wild” by Sean Penn. The character in that movie rejected the allure of money and power… literally burning his stash of cash before heading out “into the wild” to live off the sustenance and beauty of the land. He set himself free of the gilded cage.

That’s what I’m doing with my life… except I’m setting myself free of the gilded cage of MEDIA. I call it “going off the grid.”

It started in 1999 when I was the producer of the 11pm news for NBC… number one in the ratings… fully immersed and then one day I woke up and realized I was a FEAR PIMP (fear = urgency = must stay up to see this now = ratings) and I walked away. Since that day I haven’t watched a single newscast. I don’t want it in my consciousness. Ahhhhh…

Then about a year and a half ago on a shoot in San Francisco (producing for the travel show), I set my Blackberry down for an interview and it got snatched. I was in tears. Ask the DP. The next day, sans Blackberry, I had one of the most spacious, amazing, powerful days of my life. Decided to get a cheap flip phone and set myself free from knowing every last communication coming at me. Ahhhhhhh….

And on it goes… I keep pulling farther away from being at the mercy of the 30-thousand images and ideas that are being flung at us daily. But I was still bound by one big hook — BEING A GOOD CITIZEN.

Fully entrenched in the concept of being a good person, I make lists of who has called and who has emailed and like a hamster on the treadmill at the gym, I’m constantly running for the finish line of my To Do list. It never happens.

When I heard Abraham say the KEY TO ESTHER BEING ABLE TO CHANNEL this non-physical dimension is by CLEARING THE CLUTTER…. by ALLOWING HERSELF TO BE A FLAKE, I knew that it was the key for me. A lot of people hate her for it she said. Well, to avoid that is too high a price to pay. By allowing for that, she lives a really cool life — channeling Abraham all day every day. Cool, right?!!

Shockwaves…. goose bumps… more awakening!!!

My next move – freeing myself from the bonds of my ever-expanding T0-D0 list… and letting go of “controlling” other people’s opinions about me. Letting go of the need to be loved and respected by everyone who leaves me a voice mail or sends me an email.

Just saying that, I can already feel the gush of creative juices flowing hard… yah baby!!!

Buy and Accumulate

BUY AND ACCUMULATE… LATHER, RINSE, REPEAT.

I’ve been so attached the evidence my whole life… the physical… the stuff I can touch… even better, the stuff I can BUY AND ACCUMULATE… buy and accumulate… buy and accumulate… lather, rinse, repeat.

Ahhh… being a consumer.

I spent 15 years of my adult life clocking in 14 hour work days to make enough cash to have the “freedom” to buy and accumulate as much “stuff” as I wanted. Nice goal Lon, how did that work for you? Uhhhh…. it was busy, that’s for sure. My Life No Joke:

  • I bought a $625,000 house. That was cool… but definitely required even more cash and a lot of time to maintain it. For example… stressing whether that Ficas tree in the back was going to crack the pipe under the pool (i.e. not the city’s fault) and we would have to spend $10k to fix it.
  • I found time to go to the mall once a year… dedicated to finally getting that perfect wardrobe I worked so hard to afford… only to get there and be so DEVASTATED at the current state of my body that I went into a serious downward spiral.
  • The self-hate became unbearable as I exchanged hopeful Size 4’s for spirit-crushing Size 10’s. Before I knew it I was driven by a demon against my will to head straight to the Food Court for a pint of frozen yogurt to soothe my aching soul. “Oh yes, I definitely need two spoons” I tell the guy. “This isn’t just for me.” — yea, right — Promise to Self: starting tomorrow, I will finally get through the Master Cleanse… 17 days this time… 17 … till I’m a Size 4.
  • Friday night after leaving work at 8pm because 5pm on was the only time I could catch up on email, I got to pick whatever Sushi place sounded best to me… money not an issue… would go nuts on sushi and saki… ordering as much as I wanted because I “deserved it” and needed to replenish my drained energy. The Saki buzz lessened my guilt at putting off my cleanse one more day (hence stuff as much in my face as possible because it starts tomorrow).
  • Then my husband and I would spend most of the evening recovering from the day by problem-solving the frustrations of having to work with people we didn’t like. By the time we got home, we were so stuffed and exhausted that it was easier and frankly, more appealing to watch the latest installment of “LOST” than have sex (hmmm… can’t say I got the irony of that in the moment it was happening).
  • I was really into my magazines and catalogues which just might just have more interesting “stuff” for me to buy. But, since I had so little free time, I had a genius strategy of bringing them to the gym and using them to numb the pain and boredom of the treadmill, stair climber and elliptical. I could also use them to kill time while myself and all of the other hamsters stood around waiting for a free wheel. Mind you, I live in LA where it’s 75 degrees year round and my gym was ONE block from a beach. The problem was I couldn’t run on the beach AND get through my magazine stack at the same time. It just wasn’t enough of a multi-tasking opportunity to be worth it.

You get the point I’m sure.

Then… the lightening bolt hit… my whole life changed (as you saw in the profile)… and I came into deeper and deeper realization that EVERYTHING… LITERALLY EVERYTHING… in our life is energy. That means we can create anything we want out of thin air. All that “stuff” was really about feeling good for me… in some way or another every single one of those moves was done with the promise that it would deliver feeling good.

What if I could make that happen anytime, anywhere and without ANYONE OR ANYTHING?

That’s the kind of freedom I wanted — and got:

  • Now I work from home and I hardly work.
  • Because I want much less, I have the same feeling of being able to afford whatever I want. Mostly what I’ve always wanted most was FREE TIME and I have endless amounts of it now. It’s totally awesome.
  • Now I surround myself with ONLY the people I want in my life… work life included.
  • Now I have a much smaller “clean up” job because there’s not much depletion happening.

THE CLUTTER IS GOING. The clutter is going. It’s so exciting to bypass the effort and get straight to the reward.

When I was that person with the big title (executive producer of a whole network)… I looked at people like me now and I thought they were pathetic hippies. I did. I thought they just sucked at business so they criticized and rejected it. I thought they saw money as evil to justify their laziness.

It’s not that any of that changed. It’s not about any of that for me.

It was about LOCATING THE SOURCE OF MY HAPPINESS.

I LOCATED THE SOURCE OF MY FULFILLMENT

Result = absolutely LOVING my life and getting everything I want… same thing I was going for before. Cool

And that’s what this website is all about… sharing with you all that I learned and am learning about where my TRUE FULFILLMENT really comes from. I hope you get some of the juice too :– )

With love,

– L

Feeling Source Energy In My Body

Went to see Esther Hicks channel Abraham this weekend. She called on me. Being a heavily kinesthetic person, I’m an empath which means that I can feel what is going on inside someone else very easily.

Normally this is a bit of a drag because I can feel like a leaf in the wind with my energy and well being. But on Saturday it was the best thing I’ve ever experienced.

I GOT TO FEEL THAT PURE SOURCE ENERGY THAT SHE CHANNELS!!!

It felt the way most people describe a paranormal experience – my body became solid ice… but I wasn’t uncomfortable. I felt my heart and my whole being expand… like I was being tickled with a feather pushing out, out, out, out. Like how you might feel if you levitated.

In prefacing a question about how to deal with it when your relationship suddenly heads south, I told Abraham that I had been trying hard to practice the teachings. Abraham stopped me in my tracks and nailed me for “trying”… for putting “action” on the work, for “studying” all the laws, books, points, CD’s, etc. Abraham was pretty funny about it, talking about how Jerry and Esther publish all the stuff when the message boils down to ONE SIMPLE THING: GET HAPPY NOW. Just freaking get happy. That’s it. Whatever it takes. Just freaking do it. Make nothing else as important as this.

Why? Because we’re magnets and we attract whatever we’re putting out. We draw in what we turn to. If I make the work hard, I get hard work.

So… the last two days, I’ve been “trying” to lighten up.

Nice Londin.

All of this linking back to what it was to “feel” Abraham… it was pure love, absolute pure love… the kind of love where everything is simply okay exactly how it is… there IS nothing else. You know that moment after making love where there’s just nothing left to say but relishing the moment and the utter peace? That’s how it felt. All that was there for me to say was thank you. I got up and walked away. Later I went: “oh my God, I had my moment with Abraham and I blew it by not asking half the stuff I wanted to ask… How did I DO that?”

I know how I did that… I did it because of exactly what Abraham is trying to say. When you’re in pure positive energy, absolute love… there IS nothing else. There’s no problem. There’s no question. There’s no mental masturbation. There just is ALL THAT IS.

OMG!!!!!!!!!

Ego Hurts

My Dad is a fundamentalist Christian… so I heard and still hear quite often that God is a vengeful God. He punishes sin.

This scared me to death for my whole life and I’m 37 years old so that’s a long time.

I’ve never really believed it because I can’t imagine a force of unconditional love “punishing” anyone for being “bad” … but I was always really afraid to side step the idea just in case I was wrong. Ouch. That could really hurt. And even though my middle name is Angel, I’m sure if an all-knowing omniscient God looked into my life, he’d find a thing or two that would warrant a harsh trip to the fire pit.

Then I realized…. MY DAD IS RIGHT.

God is pretty vengeful when you consider God being My Higher Self. And my EGO being the smallest me I have. And my continual experience of getting a downright nasty kick in the ass whenever my ego starts running the show.

  • 12-Step programs address the Ego (edging God out)
  • Meditation practices recognize the Ego (the head chatter)
  • Loved ones recognize the Ego (“he and his damned ego again…”)
  • Enlightenment is defined as the realization of the bigger Self from the Ego “s”elf

This is powerful for me. This means that I might actually be able to relax and enjoy life a little bit if I stop fearing that there is an all-knowing force hanging around waiting to pummel me as soon as I relax, let go and do something pleasurable for myself.

I think the question to ask myself is which self is behind the desire?

Congruence

A powerful statement from my friend Shawn Brennan in a conversation we had yesterday…

“I’ve come to see that I know I am centered in that I hear what I say as the same message; when in the past I had different messages when I was awake, when I was inebriated, when I was sleepwalking, when I was being manipulative, when I was scared, and when I just didn’t care.”

What if the practice of awakening boiled down to a single behavior — telling the truth?

… first to yourself and then to your world?

When I do this I’m in congruence. Congruence is so freeing because there’s nothing to conceal. It takes energy to conceal. Concealment leaks energy. Energy medicine expert Gary Strauss has some cool thoughts on how others can pick up on whether or not you’re being congruent no matter what you say or don’t say:

What has me lie? My attachment to outcomes. When I’m pushing for a specific result that I think I must have I begin to need to frame things a certain way to control what’s so.

It’s so freeing to let that go and just trust what’s so, SEE what’s so and stop hiding from what is.

It’s really beautiful when I have enough grace to say my truth with gentleness, love and respect for others.

To Livin Large,

– L

When I’m In the Grip of Fear

Ever look at your actions during the day and realize that most of them are driven from some deep form of gut-level fear?

Do you feel like you need a nap because of the constant worry chatter in the background of your brain most of the day?

I feel it. I’m amazed at the level of fear that I project.

It’s pervasive and shape shifts depending on what portion of my day I’m in — constantly calculating on how I can achieve what I need to be okay.

My friend Tracy Griffiths astounds me. She lives virtually FEAR FREE.

What that looks like is — happy, easy going and powerful. This isn’t a woman who is fear free because she doesn’t care about anything or anyone. She has a rockin love life, business and existence. She is fully functional in manifesting whatever she wants.

What amazes me is she does it without any stress or trying.

I asked her for some tips on how it’s done… here they are… click on the video for a short infusion of magic:

Okay… so that sets you in a new direction right? If you want more of her magic, you can find Tracy in the same place as Gary (they are the cutest couple) .. go to www.polarityhealingarts.com

Hope this clip helps you let go of the gripping and expand into your biggest self possible today.

To All of us LIVING LARGE!!!

– Londin

Wanting

Often we think the road to enlightenment, awakening, etc is to renounce all desires. What if WANTING is actually where it’s at??

Hear what Gary Strauss, energy medicine expert and founder of Polarity Healing Arts School, has to say about it… pretty awesome and empowering:

Gary rocks right? Click the link above to take his classes or get a private session with him.

Chanting

GREAT CHANT FOR OVERCOMING FEAR AND WORRY:

Om Namah Shivaya Gurave

Sacchidananda-murtaye

Nishprapanchaya Shantaya

Niralambaya Tejase

THE TRANSLATION:

Om. Reverence to the Divine Absolute,

the Teacher, whose true form is Being,

Consciousness, and Bliss, who is completely

expansive, absolutely peaceful, without

the need for any external support, and

incandescent.

How sweet is that? That’s worth repeating a few times a day, huh? Here’s to your most fabulous existence possible. xoxoox

Toxic Waste Dump

I used to wake up with a Soy Latte from Starbucks…. drink about a case of Diet Coke a week (water? what’s water?)… and a few glasses of wine every night. I scrubbed my house with Tilex and AJAX… I used the birth control pill for 20 years straight… I took Tylenol PM to fall asleep and Tylenol Sinus every night to kill the post nasal drip so I could stay asleep. I took metabolism boosters from 7/Eleven and carb inhibitors before cheating. I rubbed my face with every kind of “miracle” potion I could find.

I was basically a walking chemical and it showed.

My moods were all over the place. My weight was all over the place. I didn’t get a real period for most of my life. And I felt constant sugar cravings

Then I made the connection – Toxic Dump Inside = Toxic Personality. Hmmm…

Did you realize that most of the products in your bathroom have an ingredient that is the chemical equivalent of anti-freeze? Same goes with engine degreaser.

Seriously…

Go check around… do you see Propylene Glycol or Sodium Laurel Sulphate (SLS) on any of your labels. Ever looked it up to see what it is?

I wondered why I felt like crap a lot of the time. Why my brain just didn’t seem to fire the way I wanted it to, why my emotions were all over the map, why I couldn’t seem to fall asleep or stay asleep at night.

Then I learned that my skin is an organ and absorbs what I slathered onto myself every day. I started to ask myself: Would I stick my finger in anti-freeze and suck on it? If I did, would I expect to feel very good the rest of the day?

That lead me to a complete revamp, a complete beauty overhaul. Now I publish the info I learned on www.greenlifeoils.com.

I found that by dusting off my antenna… I got a pretty rockin connection again. Rockin connection equals bliss for me.

I know my beliefs will trump all else… always. One of the most spiritually connected beings I know on this planet has never done a day of yoga in his life, chain smokes and sucks down Diet Pepsi like its manna from heaven… you’d think he’d be a toxic waste dump. He is to a certain extent in that he’s got pain, sleeping problems and what not … BUT… he’s completely dialed in to source, he’s absolutely love incarnated and he’s living a rocking existence.

So… the petro-free is not a requirement for enlightenment… but then, is ANYTHING a requirement for enlightenment? ha